Recently Mother opened a bag of your cat food (the indignity) and out fell a cat trading card. I don't think I need to tell you what a waste of cardstock THAT was. Who cares what Fluffy's favorite ratty toy is, or where his favorite place is to yak up a hairball. I've smelled that box, and let me tell you a cat is NOT worthy of adoration. Not.
I have graciously decided to create a new card for you, one that no one will every trade away. Behold.
I'm sure we can all agree this is an improvement. And to show how magnanimous I can be, I even created a card for Cricket.
You're welcome.
Signed,
Serafina
As usual, Fina.... You're brilliant!
ReplyDeleteYou are most magnanimous. Allowing Cricket to keep his brindles, (never mind his dignity), is beyond generous. You're a Giver... that's what you do... it's the Diva's Code:
ReplyDeleteSection A, Part B, Diva Code: "Always keep up the appearance of giving, as long as it does not interfere in any way with your ability to accessorize and/or do without anything yourself. Treat yourself first, because when you look good and feel good, those around you will worsh... er... admire you and want to become you, even though they are inferior."
*Roo wipes a tiny, glittering Diva Tear from her eye*