Yes, I'm addressing you directly. I've seen your jewelry.
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| You're definitely my tribe, bitch. |
Now that you've knocked out this same sex issue, can we get interspecies marriage on the docket next?
No, I don't want to marry anyone. Let's be clear. BUT.... I want people to think they have a CHANCE to marry me. Because you get the best gifts when someone wants to put a ring on it.
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| Ask this one. She knows. |
There's no one I'm interested in currently. But someday... someday soon... some smart scientist is going to genetically engineer a squirrel/lizard combination. A squirrel who drops their tail when they're under stress and grows a new one.
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| "Bushy snack farm" |
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| Hopefully it will be blingier than this. |
And when those marvelous things happen, I require engagement presents from them. And I don't want something like species to get in the way of my gift getting.
So hook a bitch up, Ruth.
Signed,
Serafina
p.s. Include fictional characters too. I've got a certain special someone in mind.
p.p.s. To any stupid sentimental Canadian brindle souls that might be lingering about... this is all about the swag. ;)
I sometimes wonder if you have too much time on your paws.........
ReplyDeleteBOL! I am not sure you want to set your sights on Hannibal. I'm not sure I'd trust him to cook for me, but I definitely agree on the squirrel hybrids and blingier jet packs!
ReplyDeleteBunny
If you weren't talking about bling, one would think you were feeding into the Fox News conspiracy issues. But since we all know it's all about the bling for you, we can rule out the haterz and send you many jewels. Or, we would if we had the money for the pricey stuff. Of course, there is always robbery of the Smithsonian Gem Museum. :-) xoxo
ReplyDelete